I was in the same boat, and honestly my therapist raised an eyebrow when she told me she’d started the split back in March. I’d have stayed and just accepted it because we have kids.
It’s a drain to be with someone like that.
Couples counseling didn’t move the needle; she’s convinced she has no problem with how she treats me, and when the counselor refused to call her out (his policy was to steer the conversation, not dictate actions), she took it as a win. Picture an hour of her listing all the ways I deserve to be treated like crap, then strolling out iwth a smug grin. I left every session feeling more alienated from her.
It’s not the nice thing to hear, but you have to ask yourself if you’ll ever find peace with someone like that. In the end I agreed to separate because our kids deserve a stable home, even if it’s only half the time.
